She’s Coming… REVEALED!


And she wants FANFIC!!!

Helen the A.I. sentient placenta from Spike Marlowe’s Placenta of Love has landed on Earth.

Your mission: Satisfy her carnal lust by creating the most awesome fanfic or fanfic banner known to mankind.


  1. The work (written or graphical) should include characters or settings from Placenta of Love, and can also include characters and settings from any other canon.
  2. Send entries to by midnight, February 29, 2012.
  3. There will be prizes! Helen the sentient A.I. placenta has brought prizes for winners directly from the stars of Placenta of Love and Venus, the theme park planet.
  4. Winners will see their fanfic and banners posted at Bizarro Central!


So, the story I write or Photoshop banner I make has to have characters or settings from Placenta of Love. What exactly does this mean?

This means you could have characters like Captain Carl, Helen the sentient placenta, Jiji the BDSM cat, Pope Natzo Innocent of the Church of Transubstantial Birth Fear, Zampano the creator, The Lady Fey, or any other character from Placenta of Love in your story or as an element of your graphic. Or you could use Venus the theme park planet or any of the rides (e.g., The Fellini Wheel, The Tilt ‘N Hurl, The Flying U, The Ziggurot, The Driller, The Balbosa, or The Dark Caberet, etc.) as a setting.

Or, you could write fanfic with your own pirate, or placenta, or your own kinky kitty. And you could set it on your own theme park planet. Or you can make up your own amazing park rides.

That’s all well and good, but let’s talk about the part I came here for. This is fanfic, right. Does this mean I can use other favorite media characters?

YES! Please!

This also means you can use settings from other favorite media as well.

Got any examples?

You bet your sweet bippy!

Maybe Harry Potter, dressed as if he just stepped out of Burning Man, has a date with Emperor Palpatine at the most amazing carnival in the universe.

Could Spock and a kinky kitty find love in the midst of a planet filled with pirate aliens? Of course!

Or, for you hardcore Bizarro folks, how about Helen the Placenta and Captain Carl get experimental with the Baby Jesus Butt-plug in the Sea of Patchwork Cats during an angel dust apocalypse?

That’s awesome, Spike! There’s a little problem. I’m totally meaning to get around to reading your book, but I haven’t exactly gotten to it yet. I seriously want to make an awesome Photoshop banner of Blackbeard’s ghost from that old Disney film getting it on with Dr. Who on top of Helen the  A.I. placenta at the Disney Small World attraction. Got any advice?

Yes! Though I would love for people to read Placenta of Love, it’s more important that people have fun. There are several resources for those who want to check out the Placenta of Love universe without reading the book:

  • An audio file of the first two chapters of Placenta of Love are at the bottom of the review for Placenta of Love at Dreadful Tales.
  • You can also watch the Love the Placenta! page here at my website where I’m going to be posting character and setting profiles over the next couple of weeks. You can start with Chapter 1 and Chapter 2.

After that? Have FUN!

If you have any questions, feel free to shoot me an email at

(I do not own any of the above characters, except for Helen the sentient A.I. placenta and other characters from Placenta of Love, including Harry Potter, Fox Mulder, Sailor Moon and Captain Kirk.)


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